Gross Pedophiles Ruin Tumblr Porn For All The Good Honest Pervs Out There

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tumblr porn ban
Safe for how long, my glitter-thonged friend?

This is why we can’t nice things people.

In response to the massive proliferation of child abuse images on the social media platform, as well as ongoing issues with spam accounts and bots, Tumblr CEO Jeff D’Onofrio has announced that from December 18 all sexual explicitly images will be banned from the site.

The ban comes weeks after the iOS version of the Tumblr app was pulled from Apple’s app store, after Apple determined that it was being used as way for pedophiles to exchange and display child abuse images.

Tumblr Is Was For Porn

The ban has been met with consternation from committed pervs, as Tumblr has long provided a safe haven for some of the weirder manifestations of the human erotic imagination.

Although Tumblr’s popularity as a social media platform peaked around 2014, it retained a committed user base of people too embarrassed to tell their real-life friends that they were active on Tumblr.

With a largely female user base and reputation for catering to LGBTQ+ communities, Tumblr provided an alternative for many put off by mainstream porn sites.

In its own glitchy, grubby, sweaty-palmed way Tumblr retained some of the spirit of the early internet, before the MindGeek juggernaut homogenized all but the most niche of online porn production into one great big step-daughter big boob frat house orgy bus.

Verizon Sees What You’re Doing On Tumblr And Is Very Disappointed In You

Anonymous, sometimes arty (link nsfw), and often extremely niche sexual communities flourished on Tumblr, even after Yahoo acquired the site in 2013.

But when Yahoo itself was bought by Oath, the digital arm of US telecoms giant Verizon, in June 2017, many Tumblr users suspected that the writing was on the wall for the free exchange of weirdo Tumblr art porn.

They have now been proved right, in the most Tumblr way possible with all images of genitalia and “female presenting nipples” banned from the site.

This itself is likely to present a problem for the sizable subset of Tumblr’s bigender-nippled community with development coordination disorder, who know that they have one female and one male-presenting nipple but are not completely certain which is left and which is right.

But these dysphoric dyspraxics may take some comfort from the fact, that while Tumblr may take away their porn, they can never take their fanfic.

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